Firstly, I have been incredibly busy with setting up my new business, I knew it would take up a lot of time and hard work but I had no idea how much, especially doing it all alone!
I'm at the beginning stages. I did fashion and marketing in university which I didn't think paid off at the time but now i'm designing everything myself it's a lot easier because I know what i'm doing.
I have a lot of fans who are impatient with me and asking what i'm doing next, and I feel so guilty because I cannot give them a lot of information in regards to a few things and i'm rushing my new line for my Gina's Diamonds xxx
I'm back also means mentally. I'm usually a very private person and I never tell people my personal business. But lately i've felt better in myself to be more open and tell people things i'm going through and some friends of mine have been very much there for me and have helped me tremendously.
If i'm honest, I have had a tough few years. A lot of people seem to think that just because I have a comfortable life and I can shop when I want and do as I like, at the end of the day i'm still human and I still have my own problems. People need to understand that no ones perfect, (however it is nice if your lucky enough to find a partner that thinks you're perfect in every way, we will save that for another post).
So when I say i'm back, I'm back mentally. When I came out of the Big Brother house, it was weird enough for me to get back to normality then to find out two weeks later that my grandmother died. She was 92 years of age so I guess she lived her life as you would call it. But she was like a second mother to me and such an amazing person! She was a posh, classy woman with great morals and a personality we all loved and miss dearly. If i'm honest that happened in September and 8 months on it didn't sink in until a few weeks ago that she had gone.
Other than dealing with the loss of my grandmother i've had other things which needed sorting out. I havent been myself for the past year and a half. I had been on and off with my ex boyfriend until recently I was forced to end it for good. Which could have been the best thing I ever did.
I won't go into too much detail. But a year into the relationship I became very unhappy, not myself. Stopped seeing my friends even family. It was pretty tough. I'm usually very confident, independent and very outspoken but I would say I definitely lost my confidence, and started to become shy to talk to people and wherever I would go people would ask me if i'm okay? because I became this different person that no one recognised.
I would just like to say, to anyone out there, at the beginning stages of a relationship, if you sense even one thing that you don't like about that person, or if you feel that they have an aggressive nature, or if you feel that you are changing as a person and they are trying their hardest to control you please leave that person! Life is too short and way too precious to live your life unhappy. There could be soo many other things you could do being happy than wasting your time.
I'm tired of feeling low everyday of my life for nearly two years, and frightened to do as I like without someone watching my every move and having their opinions on the way I live my life!
I've always been a free spirit with so much confidence which I have lost for a while now
We all make mistakes, and we all have regrets but we are only human at the end of the day and we can only learn from our mistakes in life and know better next time.
Thank you for reading!
Love Gina xoxo